As I sit back and allow myself to daydream, my mind goes back to the year when I went through some counseling with the aim of getting married. I had met this guy that I felt would be a lovely dude to spend the rest of my life with and since we were members of the same church, there was very little opposition when we approached our various zonal pastors and made our intentions known. Before long, we got into the list for counselees who were tying the knot soon. The programme was awesome! Enjoyable, insightful, mature, spiritually enlightening, to mention but the least. To cut the long story short, this ain’t the guy who married me. I know you’re wondering why I got into so much detail, well, there’s one thing I learnt during this period that stuck with me for life: COUNTERFEIT.
One of the assignments we had been given is seven pointers on whether your fiancé is the ONE or not. Among the things to watch out for was ‘marrying a counterfeit’. This was the person you were 100% sure you wanted to spend the rest of your life with but you hadn’t taken him/her through screening, you hadn’t given the thought time to mature, etc. As the definition goes, this counterfeit partner was one who was a fake replica of your real soul mate; one who portrayed exactly the characteristics you went out searching for but contained a hidden agenda, character, with the intention to deceive or defraud. In short, this is a sham, bogus, fake person.
Have you ever heard of the saying that goes, ‘All shall be tested on the things they have learnt’? You better be attentive in the classroom you are in. Exams are round the corner. I jumped out of my premarital counseling class (which was aborted since I discovered that wasn’t ‘the’ dude) and bumped into my counterfeit. It’s a shame I failed that exam; big time!
Shortly after learning this lesson, I get my prince charming; I was so sure that I was done with all the frogs (I wonder whether this same saying is used in China where frogs aren’t viewed as bad). This guy came with a bounce and a tilt that swept me off my feet. This guy knew the things that ticked my clock and caused my boat to float. I opened up to him and lay myself bear before him (quite close to idolatry). This is coz I had been to many places, done so many unthinkables, broken a few hearts, thus I was sure these things could follow me to my matrimonial home, why not expose myself in advance. When it was his turn, he came out as one who had never sinned, never erred in his entire life. This was one of the many red flags that I still didn’t see. Just mention anything perfect, he was.
Before I could say ‘Jack Robinson’, I was Mrs. Counterfeit. This is a follow up from the previous post https://anneobure.wordpress.com/2015/09/24/september-the-24th/ I am still suffering the consequences of a bogus marriage. Sham is synonymous to counterfeit and quite close to his name.
I wouldn’t wanna leave it on a sad note; not my nature. I have a way of making the best out of what I have. I have decided to view that experience as a necessary one. Since the counterfeit didn’t damage my originality (though it almost did), I have lived to tell the story. I’ll make sure that it is heard and read to the rooftops. Others can learn from it. I am rising up, still dusting myself as I revise the lessons I need to master. I’ve got an F1 generation to care for. Though he physically resembles the counterfeit (looks exactly like daddy), he’s still innocent and I’ll strive to ensure that he remains so by imparting original ideas, genuine motives and sincere character into his heart.
The big question is: How can something so fake produce something so real?
The big answer is: A God who ain’t a respecter of persons.
I’m honored to have a second chance. Lack of a cowardice spirit in me will result into trying that journey again sometime.